10:20 p.m. || 2005-10-05
Kids are GIANT these days
YO!
It's been a weird day.
I finally called Ali tonight. I haven't called her before now (I've text) I dunno, it just seemed like if I called her then it would make it real that she was away. If I didn't think about it or speak to her, I could pretend she was still around. I'm glad I did speak to her though. I needed a good dose of Ali. Every time I think about it I get sad (not in an I want to die depression way, just in an, I miss the old days way). But I loved talking to her and its not long till she is coming home for a weekend. I'm in the middle of making her a picture for her room. Must post a picture of it. It amuses me.
Yeah, so. I was so excited for teaching today and I got to the school really early. The head greeted me and was lovely, introduced me to the staff and I went to look at the 'planning' (explanation of the 'planning' in a little while).
I honestly didn't even feel nervous and yet as soon as I sat infront of the class I literally froze. I couldn't move or speak and I just wanted to cry. I actually was terrified. It just crept up from nowhere. I finally managed to just walk away (slap myself really hard) walk back in take a breath and introduce myself. FOR GOODNESS SAKE THEY'RE 7 YEARS OLD!!!!!!
I didn't do a very good job of the first lesson. I was just shaking and concentrating on not running away. the class weren't even that bad, my goodness, I've taught some horrors and this lot were nothing in comparison.
As the day went on though I picked up and actually started to feel calmer by the end of the day.
I don't know how I feel now. It wasn't a terrible day, but I thought I'd love it and I didn't. It was weird being a supply teacher. After the general introduction, nobody spoke to me all day (the kids did - obviously). When I came to go home at 5.00pm (it took me that long to mark) all of the teachers had gone and noone even said bye or checked that everything was ok. I could have trashed the classroom and killed the kids for all they knew!
I had half an hour in a year 5/6 class and now know I will never teach that age - obnoxious little twats! Cheekiness is not endearing past a certain age, plus they're all bigger than me so I'm not so scary when I get mad. I just have to look at the little ones and they know they've crossed the line - the glare doesn't work so well when you have to look up to your pupils to do it and they look down on you and glare defiantly back! Kids are GIANT these days!!!!
Anyway, I'm not too bothered by that because I kind of expected not to like it and it was only half an hour.
Anyway, on calling the school prior to the assignment ( hehe assignment sounds oh so official). I was assured that all planning would be left for me. It kind of was, but bearing in mind I have NEVER met these children before, I don't know how I was expected to carry it out successfully.
Planning was as follows:
"Good morning
I am on duty today so you will have to blow the whistle and collect the children from the yard
Literacy is retelling key points of the story.U se the Ugly Duckling.
More able - to talk about how the duck was feeling
Average - as objective
Lower - sentences
Numeracy - We are problem solving. Find as many ways out of a maze as possible. Use different coloured pencils. Use the OHT. I have to analyse this work and report back to the maths advisor.
Thinking skills - discussion of the odd one out of 3 pictures (picture of owl, penguine and kingfisher provided)
Geography - we have been doing map work. Children need to draw an object from 3 different views.
DT
Sort foods into groups. They need to know that you need a bit of each for a healthy diet.
You are on yard duty. Have a nice day"
There were some padding out words in there but that was the information I was given to teach kids that I had never met.
NOTHING was differentiated. I was given no instruction or format of how to record. I didn't have a class list or even a list of the different abilities or groupings. He didn't leave any worksheets or tell me which books to use or wher ethey were kept, the one he did leave wasnt actually ready.
I wouldn't have minded bringing my own stuff. I would have known it and had my head around that so been more comfortable teaching it. I had 4 SEN children in the clas and this wasn't even mentioned. How could they be expected to do the same work as the others. AND in YEAR 2 some children were still EMERGENT WRITERS. They didn't know how to write 'I' or 'a'.
Maybe thats why I got scared. I didn't really know what I was teaching or to who. I know leaving planning for a supply is a pain, but if ever I had someone covering, I left full lessons plans, details of any IEPs - pointers for who to look out for in the class. I would leave planning with the assistant so she would help any queries.ALL RESOURCES photocopied and ready, a list telling them where to find everything in the classroom. I DIDNT EVEN KNOW WHICH CHILDREN I HAD TO COLLECT FROM THE YARD and when I asked, a teacher replied "the year 2 class" - oooh that helps!
So actually, considering what I had to work from, the kids produced some pretty decent stuff. they liked me and asked if I would come back again. I said maybe!
This is a totally boring entry. If youve actually read it all - poor you, go have a coffee to wake you up again!
I think the experience of suppply was just very different from having my own class - perhaps I will get used to it! Maybe they wont ask me back!
hugses Leesmry x x x x
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